exhibit seventeen

It looks like fun 'til that nice girl from school goes for a ride and the next time you see her she's on "Cops" screamin' "my babies, my babies" as the social worker carries them out of her meth lab.

exhibit sixteen

This girl's showin' lots of skin and even standing next to a motorcycle tryin' to get this young man's attention. Guess he's just a biker 'cause he's not Fuckin' anything in that suit.

exhibit fifteen

I've always had a lot of respect for europeans and this proves my point. Boys and Girls; if you want to throw your lives away riding around on motorcycles, at least do it on something nice like this. It has a solid roll cage, a seat belt, it's very stylish and appears plenty zippy while getting around town! It may not be a Smart Car but it's a big step in the right direction.

exhibit fourteen

You'd think there can't be anything more stupid than a Fuckin' Biker. You'd be wrong. This Fuckin' Biker Chick picked the hottest day in August to ride her bike into the middle of the Mojave Desert, buy a bottle of water, fill her bike up, and ride back home. She said it was "fun."

exhibit thirteen

We were lucky to find this bike for our thirteenth post. It's used for the Devil's work and I seen him myself. He was racin' around the desert squishin' baby animals and damaging sensitive ecosystems. The fucker didn't even have a green sticker! ...OK I didn't see 'em myself but those people in Washington DC and Sacramento came to me in my dreams and told me all about it.

exhibit twelve

What an asshole. The only things worse than this shit pile is the guy's haircut and the quality of the photo. Fuckin' asshole!

exhibit eleven

Look at this Fuckin' Cat! She's finally figured out a good use for this bike. Maybe she'll bury it when she's done.

exhibit ten

While my next door neighbor was bangin' the guy who lived across the street's mom, the guy who lived across the street stole my next door neighbor's chopper and put the motor in his Ninja. Anyway, this is what you end up with. It may not look like much but the guy who lived across the street was able to outrun the next door neighbor's Camaro and made it back to Camp Pendleton before the end of his 48.

exhibit nine

How stupid is this? An innocent child could walk up behind this one and poke an eye out! Anybody dumb enough to ride it better wear long pants. German engineering...

exhibit eight

Nobody hates bikes more than me, but I have to admit if this thing had two more wheels it'd every bit as nice as an Accord or Civic. For a fuckin'biker this guy actually has a little class.

exhibit seven

This is how it all starts. Some damn'd kid in Texas finds one of these under the Christmas Tree and next thing you know girls are beggin' him for rides. He moves on to bigger bikes and faster women, then it's straight to hell WFO!

exhibit six

I hate these fuckin' Ninjas the most. I seen some asshole on one just like this put the brakes on so hard he almost flipped over. He just hung there in a backwards wheelie for a couple hundred feet. He's lucky there wasn't a tail wind. Idiot.

exhibit five

Another one without a front fender! How do these fuckin' bikers expect to get jobs when they show up for interviews with mud on their suits? And who in hell puts BMW parts on a chopper? Fuckin' bikers in suits do...that's who.

exhibit four

It's hard to believe the folks who brought us cars thrilling and wonderful as the Accord and Civic could be responsible for this assault on humanity!

exhibit three

Who would taunt the good Lord by runnin' around on a bike with a lightnin' rod on the back and lightnin' bolts painted on his hat? Let's pray he's at least wearing rubber soled boots.